The Friendship Now

Answer side by side

Write the state of us — one honest paragraph on who we are to each other, today.

The question sits across the top; you each answer on your own page. Whoever writes second reads the first answer before writing — agree, argue, or correct the record.

Why this question

Present tense. No nostalgia allowed on this page; there's a whole book for that.

And once you’ve both answered

Date it. It will be worth comparing in ten years.

Answering it honestly

  • Whoever writes second reads the first answer before writing — properly, not a skim. Your page can agree, argue, or correct the record.
  • Be specific. Dates, places, what was playing, who else was there. Wrong details are welcome; they're evidence.
  • Don't negotiate a joint version. Two accounts that refuse to match are worth more than one polished one.

And the house rule, whatever the mode: leave a blank rather than write a lie. A blank can be filled later; a lie sits in the archive forever, and you both have to live with the paperwork.

More from The Friendship Now

What do I seem to be carrying at the moment, from where you stand?

If this friendship had a private charter — the two or three things we quietly promise each other by just being who we are — what would they actually be?

How has the friendship recalibrated as life sped up — and has the current setting got it right?