The Friendship Now

Answer side by side

How are you, actually? Not the version you give at the door.

The question sits across the top; you each answer on your own page. Whoever writes second reads the first answer before writing — agree, argue, or correct the record.

Why this question

Health, money, work, the thing that circles at four in the morning. Whatever's true.

And once you’ve both answered

This page is the asking. Answer it properly and I'll do the same.

Answering it honestly

  • Whoever writes second reads the first answer before writing — properly, not a skim. Your page can agree, argue, or correct the record.
  • Be specific. Dates, places, what was playing, who else was there. Wrong details are welcome; they're evidence.
  • Don't negotiate a joint version. Two accounts that refuse to match are worth more than one polished one.

And the house rule, whatever the mode: leave a blank rather than write a lie. A blank can be filled later; a lie sits in the archive forever, and you both have to live with the paperwork.

More from The Friendship Now

If a stranger sat opposite us at dinner, what would they make of this friendship?

When did you last cry laughing because of me — actual tears?

What do you lean on me for now — as opposed to what it used to be?